Wednesday, 19 March 2014

Swan Song...

So much has come to a head since my last post..

First decision of the New Year was to lose weight, well 7kg and counting, second was to admit I need to divorce my husband and stop fucking around, not literally I might add. Thirdly, I'm going home, as in the UK, to London, with both kids. Fourthly, I discovered just how behind on the rent we are and we have an enforced, interim move into the basement, yes, the BASEMENT, of our current building...we can't move back until him in Spain has some cash and that is likely to be June, so in the meantime three of us will live in a studio..yay..

This last has been the hardest. Packing up and disposing of eight years of life here and no confirmation of when we can go home..It's killing me a little piece at a time. So far I've disposed of hundreds of books, sacks and sacks of clothes, furniture, toys..our life here in fact. I know it's only "stuff" but having the disposal enforced does not make me happy. It's desperately sad.

To get me through the tough times I've developed an unbelievable obsession with a certain Mr. Tom Hiddleston...Yes, hook, line and sinker! I watch all his films, I tumblr him endlessly! It's childish and idiotic but when the alternative is sobbing in a corner...what prompted me to blog today though was listening to his thoughts on risk taking, having no regrets etc. Initially some of these things made me cry as I feel  like one big regret right now...then I thought it through. 8 years, in a foreign country, two kids, no husband, always short of cash, now finally saying enough, time to move on...hmmmm. Probably quite a big risk taker when you look at it that way. So, here's to moving on, forward and to better things! From where I'm standing the only way is up..I've a feeling there may be a few more levels down before the ascent begins but it will.

So expect a few more ruminations before we get there and if you're lucky maybe a few gif sets of Mr. H... ;)